If it comes back its yours?

Lunch at work and some "me" time at all time favorite spot.

Lunch at work and some “me” time at all time favorite spot.

Once again let’s talk about letting it go. If it comes back it is yours, of that how are you sure? Perhaps it came back for you as a test if you can once again let it go? Why are you looking back at those closed doors?

Within those closed doors was once where you felt secure. Till one day when it pushed up back and on your face it closed. And up till this day you think for your heart ache that is where you will find the cure.

You try to be patient till God finally will open the next door. At times you get impatient and about what’s ahead you seem unsure. Ignoring that God is with the patient ones (Surah Al-Baqarah) and to you again and again He assures.

So why can’t you let it go  what you once called yours? Why can’t you trust that something better is planned for you at the next door?

Something better for all that you endured. Something better where your heart will feel secure. Something better that you can finally call yours.


The day you walk alone.

Turn your face to the sun and shadows fall behind you.

Turn your face to the sun and shadows fall behind you. Downtown Toronto

It’s been a while since I wrote. I guess you can say I was in the middle of the sea and got lost with my boat. There are times in our lives where we ask ourselves towards which way do we float? There is Someone there Who is pulling us towards this one way as if by a remote. Truth be told it is a long way. We walk and run, at times we think of it all as amusement and play (Surah Al-Hadid). Then we fall down while playing  shedding those tears and remember to once again pray. Who is guiding our way? Who is not letting us get lost and protecting us from being of those who from their path go astray?

One night in November you walk home alone. It is dark, it is quite and only through street lights the path is shown. The struggle you feel this night you never felt before. You cry and say out loud Oh God please let me sit right here on this road. Is it possible to not have the strength to walk not even to your house door? With a broken heart and no strength You keep going on and the pain you ignore.

You want to fall down or sit but something keeps pushing you from the back. Something keeps telling you that if you fall down on the road, you will loose this so you cannot slack. From all around you feel as if you are being attacked. Then all of a sudden as if you see light passing through a crack. It is a light from your home so you run towards it as fast as you can. And finally you reach home and you let it all out. You run to your room and let those tears finally fall down to the ground. There is no more pain or struggle, but rather tears of happiness and in your thoughts you drown…

There is finally an understanding of the concept that this is truly how your life goes. No matter what street you walk through at the end you must come home.  Since you know where your house is and to you the path is shown. Now you do a bit of exploring, get lost in few streets but as long as you get back to the street that is your own. We get lost many times in our lives but what matters is how many times we bring ourselves back towards the path that is known. No matter what we do in our lives we must return back to the One who owns the Throne ( Surah Al-Baqarah). Now it is up to us if we want to wander the streets being lost or do we want to return back home?

As long as we want to return to our home God won’t let us fall. At times we will walk and run and in hard times He will even help us crawl. As long as we keep the intention of returning back home He will even help us break walls. As long as we keep doing good on our way He won’t give up and will continue to call. This is your walk alone so at all times you must stand tall. People will walk with you for a while but then turn into the streets where their houses are. But at the end we all must get to our homes it is where we belong. It is all a matter of telling ourselves that you can do it because you are strong.


Getting inspired by these beauties on a rainy day.

Getting inspired by these yummy ice cream truffles on a rainy day.

It is hard for us to face rejection. Because around us we want no negativity and from others always want to see affection. There are many times we don’t even want something but when we get rejected by it we want to compete. Why didn’t I get selected, Why didn’t they pick me… that wanting of always being on top and others we want to beat. Not realizing that we got rejected by this because there is something better waiting for us down the street.

You can keep tasting chocolates till you eat the one that tastes best out of all. You will keep getting rejected until you have enough experience to still stand tall. You will keep getting rejected at interviews till you reach the one job that is meant to be yours. You will keep facing rejection till you reach that person you are actually  made for. You will keep asking for help in something and getting rejected till you knock on that one door. And you will keep failing that test over and over again till you get enough practice to get the highest score.

It is hard for us to face rejection because we always want to win. It doesn’t matter if we don’t even want that thing. We still busy ourselves with competing, loosing our sleep over it and making our heads spin. We get rejected only because there is something better for us at end. Think back to your life today and all those rejections through which you have been. Would you have all that you have today, or all that you did achieve if you stopped at that thing? We always think we know what is best for us but it is actually God who knows it all (Surah al-baqarah) and that is how it has always been. But sadly we forget it every time by competing, because this world we are trying to win.

Gold in that glitter

love working with glitter; always searching for the gold.

love working with glitter; always searching for the gold.

Those lessons that you sometimes think back to. When you had a talk with someone and out of the whole thing that is the only thing towards which your attention drew. They said everything they wanted to and that one line you remembered till now that you sometimes think back to? That is the lesson you need to give value. Often times God sends you clues. They don’t fall down the sky but from different sources they come through. The reason you remember them up till now is because that is something you need to put your attention to. And work on improving yourself by putting your focus on that view.

It doesn’t matter if those people are still in your life or not. Because everyone stays in your life for a limited time if you give it a thought. Some walk away before others and to you some good lessons they taught. While others stick strong with you  till the end of time as if you have been tied in a knot. The ones that walk away sooner give you a lesson that you need to learn right now. But sometimes we put our focus on why they walked away from us, looking for answers to what and how? Rather than being thankful for the lesson we learned and how it made us wise … yes wow?

Today I reflect on how I learned. Sometimes you are taught the same lesson again and again till to it your attention you turn. Yes you get hurt sometimes but the wise ones are those who actually went through the pain to earn. Because if it wasn’t for the pain there is nothing that you will learn. Because new skin comes only after you get burned.

God does not test you beyond what you are capable of (Surah Al-Baqarah). So those lessons and  that one sentence you remember up till now take it as a gift sent from above. Today look back at what you remember and what you were taught. Through those people that are still in your life and those who decided to walk their own path. You will always remember something from the experiences you go through. Today sit back by yourself and think of each of them from a different point of view. Because in all that glitter of your life experiences those lessons are the only gold you will find hidden through.

Your visit to that favourite place.

When you build four walls for yourself; make sure there is a window to look out; today's inspiration be my window and beautiful flowers I planted.

When you build four walls for yourself; make sure there is a window to look out; today’s inspiration be my window and beautiful flowers I planted.

I have been wanting to write about this since few months back. The thought stayed in my head so today I want you to pack your bags. To that country you always wanted to go to we are going to fly away. For few days, a month or two we will stay. you are excited and you really can’t wait. It’s the day of our flight  now we are stuck in traffic and with our flight there is a delay. You are stressed, to get there you don’t know how to find another way. Finally you are on the plane and you are looking forward to your stay. The plane is landing now, you can’t control your excitement and can’t wait. Here is the surprise now you landed in some other country that you never wanted to go to…  what just happened? you can’t think straight. Now you complain here and there and not much can be done. why would this happen to you just when you wanted to enjoy life and have fun? I heard this story in one of my course lecture in university few months back. Right the next morning of the night when I felt all confused and of my life I didn’t know how to keep track. I stared with my eyes wide open and felt like by the presenters of the story I was being attacked. That it didn’t turn out to be how I planned something now take that!!

So I stared with wide eyes and started to think. let me relate it all for that lets go back to the country I left you in. Are you mad? Are you depressed? How you been? Now if you sit there to complain the whole time you will find nothing within. I ask you to walk down the street with me you agree… so we begin. We walk for a while and you see the beauty around you and now you are starting to grin. Hey it’s not so bad after a while you are starting to think. You are starting to get used to it and you are having a good stay. Now look at it as that our lives work in a similar way!!

You plan and plan for something to happen just the right way. The time finally comes and your whole life changed. Nothing of what you planned happened  and you feel betrayed. You are angry you are mad for a while you complain and then you don’t know what to say. If you keep complaining about where you always wanted to go. You won’t get to enjoy where you are right now though. Where you are is where you were always meant to be someday you will know. When all the puzzles in your life will fit and a full picture it will complete and show. When you build four walls around you make sure there is always a window.  So you can look out of that room and to the outside world you can say hello.

The pain you feel from not getting what you wanted to happen someday it will outgrow. It will take a month or two or even years give it time it will be slow. There will be times where you will have no strength to face this world and you will feel low. There will be times you will be lost in your thoughts trying to figure out where you went wrong though. There will also be times you will be annoyed and you will ignore all the other blessings on you that has been bestowed. But it’s okay let it all out so you can let it go. Because to see the beauty of your current place the past thoughts and plans you need to get rid of and throw. Now you like your current place but sometimes you think of that country you always wanted to go. Those thoughts come back to you not to annoy but to make you realize and show. That you can also be happy in a place that you never wanted to go. Always remember He knows what you do not know (Surah al-baqarah). And some day to you He will reveal and show.

I hope you enjoy your visit in that place you never wanted to go.

Surrounded by ease


These beautiful lillies in my front lawn; July 2014

I am sitting in my office and reflecting on how I am surrounded by ease. I have the freedom to do as I please. Then my thoughts drift and I think of the muslims that are right now on their knees. Asking Allah to protect them and bring them relief. Because I have to get back to work I’ll be quick and brief. Recently I started getting different forward messages on my phone saying pray for Palestine please. There were few saying that with Palestine Allah is angry so please recite this and that and they will have ease. Glory be to Him you do not know what He knows let me just give a reminder frankly…

A rose is surrounded by thorns just as Palestine is facing unease. It is you that should be worried because you are surrounded by way too much ease. what is happening to them you clearly see. Then why are you not thankful every second and still do as you please? be humble, realize, reflect and please show some humility.

Just remember Jannah doesn’t come cheap. It is surrounded by hardships and difficulty while Hellfire is surrounded by desires and ease. We all are being tested just reflect on that please. Don’t assume by yourself that with you Allah is happy thats why you have the ease. And just because they are going through hardships Allah is angry… Perhaps it is you that is being tested so take a minute to reflect on your deeds.

take the good that comes to you and be grateful for it please. While you do that remember the ones suffering and Ask Allah to make it easy for them and bring them victory and relief. I’ll end with a ayah that always brings my focus back and hits me hard.

Or do you think that you will enter Paradise while such [trial] has not yet come to you as came to those who passed on before you? They were touched by poverty and hardship and were shaken until [even their] messenger and those who believed with him said,”When is the help of Allah ?” Unquestionably, the help of Allah is near(Surah Al-Baqarah).

He knows what you do not know and He is the All Seer. So please don’t go assuming who He is happy and angry with because what you can’t even imagine or see is not hidden from Him and He sees it all clear.