words that haven't been spoken. actions that have and haven't been taken. thoughts that came to mind through inspiration. lessons that were learned after being mistaken. towards writing I hasten. peace be on you ツ
There comes a time in a life where you feel like you are facing a wall. You are stuck, you can’t get over it, you feel so small. Sometimes everything happens at once and sometimes nothing happens at all. You can’t make a decision so you sit there crying and your eyes you bawl. Forgetting that this is your life and you must stand tall.
All that only happens only when you look towards others to make your decisions for you. Instead of hearing your own heart and listening to what it wants you to do. Recently someone told me get rid of your emotions will you? And I sit there and question with a dead heart how are you supposed to survive this life through? How do you walk around pretending you are OK and inside you don’t feel gray and blue? It is very easy for some while it becomes an everyday battle for some in their own shoes. To get up and pretend as their lives pass through. Their hearts already dead just waiting for them to be dead too. And this is a life story of so many if only you knew.
Can I do this? Can I do that? Asking others for approvals for things you actually want to do. Goals you want to achieve, visions you want to make true. And then someone answers no and you sit there think ‘maybe they are right and I am not capable for this to do.’ You keep hearing disapprovals from others that you end up living the average life as others do. Forgetting that the One who created you never limited your goals and visions and that He is the One who inspires you to do. He controls your Hearts and is the One who puts those feelings in your hearts for you.
And here you are being silly asking for approval from His creation as if they control you. Not standing up for yourself and what you want to do. Living to please others, scared they might not like you. Giving others power over yourself when God is the One holding all power and He is the One who created you. Letting your heart die and then feeling sorry for yourself too. When will you stand up for yourself and you decisions. Please tell me that will you? Is it today? Is it tomorrow? Will it be too late? Or will you find the courage to do it soon?
I think I find it funny that the last time I wrote was about giving them a piece of your mind. Letting it out and show that you were not blind.But then you never know in tomorrow what will you find. In a month you can turn blind. By that I don’t mean literally but by this world that you have been racing behind. This heart of yours constantly reminds. But from one thing to another through out the day… you don’t have time?
So you struggle day by day… just few minutes to yourself … just some thoughts… just to make sense of what is really on your mind. Running from one thing to another, keeping yourself together that nine to five grind. You complain to yourself, others around you and they try to be kind. But where is that peace of mind?!
You leave one thing for another, try to fit it all and a thought from the past runs through your mind. Where once you wanted to be busy, you wanted a routine, you got what you wanted? Oh wow? Your God is Most Kind (Surah Al-Hajj). You still have the nerves to sit here and complain that you don’t have time? When you once wanted it all, why are you so blind?
Being grateful for it all is where you will find that peace of mind. What you have been searching for, what your heart to you is trying to remind. Sometimes to get peace of mind you need to give yourself a piece of your own mind. Because truly your God is Most Kind. He is Most Kind.
Lunch at work and some “me” time at all time favorite spot.
Once again let’s talk about letting it go. If it comes back it is yours, of that how are you sure? Perhaps it came back for you as a test if you can once again let it go? Why are you looking back at those closed doors?
Within those closed doors was once where you felt secure. Till one day when it pushed up back and on your face it closed. And up till this day you think for your heart ache that is where you will find the cure.
You try to be patient till God finally will open the next door. At times you get impatient and about what’s ahead you seem unsure. Ignoring that God is with the patient ones (Surah Al-Baqarah) and to you again and again He assures.
So why can’t you let it go what you once called yours? Why can’t you trust that something better is planned for you at the next door?
Something better for all that you endured. Something better where your heart will feel secure. Something better that you can finally call yours.
These cupcakes from a friend’s bridal party reminding me that it’s not always about you.
Maybe It’s weird that I am thinking about love while being in bed because of fever and flu. Is it selfish or not? For some it is sadly that is true. There is selfishness in a type of love that only makes you think about you. The other person is always wrong and only you can be true. Only you have a thinking and you don’t try to understand the other person’s point of view. You never bother to look at things or try walking in the other person’s shoes. What you like, what you want is the only thing others should do. And then you get frustrated when things don’t remain the same between you. And you ignore that once these people were truer than true. Is this really love? Sadly yes and we all have that within us including me and you.
There has been times in our lives when we have either been an example of this or been treated like this by someone we knew. And we have only realized this when we stepped back and looked at the situation from a different point of view. Sometimes we are totally wrong but sometimes others don’t understand us even if we are true. As if all of a sudden they are deaf, dumb and blind and sometimes that is exactly the reason why from them faraway we grew. Which is actually surprising because once upon a time we used to be stuck together like glue.
The ones who understand the meaning of love are actually very few. The ones who like others for who they are and are not trying to change them into an ideal image they drew. Who not only talk but have the patience to understand the other person’s point of view. And those who have the courage to actually walk in other people’s shoes. What others like they actually step out of their comfort zone to try it too.
Truth be told the unselfish love is not found in this world even if we try searching for it all the way through. Because The One who loves us unconditionally is the One who created me and you. The reason we get frustrated is because we are searching for love that will fill this space in our hearts and be always true. But that space is only filled with God’s love, the reason why to Him we always turn to. But sadly because of searching for love in this world from Him faraway we drew.
And then you spend hours and days thinking over why you can’t work things out between others and you? Why can’t others try to understand your point of view? It is only because you are thinking about yourself and sometimes you are called selfish too. Yet you still search for that unconditional love and sadly you want it while you still think about only yourself too.
There are nights when you can’t fall asleep. Your heart wants to talk and your eyes want to weep. You don’t know where life is going, the road ahead looks very steep. You don’t know what to count on, you don’t know what is there to keep. You don’t know the traps ahead you don’t know when to jump and leap. So you lay there in the dark wondering, sighing and taking breathes that are deep. Hoping that in a while someone will come looking for you and take you back home as if you are a lost sheep…
What brings peace to your heart is that there is Someone else who knows all these thoughts tonight that are hidden within you very deep. What puts you sleep at the end is that there is Someone who will protect you from those puddles and will teach you when to jump and leap. The one who created your heart is who it wants to connect to and to Him your eyes want to complain to and weep. And here you are wondering what is wrong with life and why you can’t sleep…
Countless lessons you keep learning as His blessings He sends. To be wise is one thing but there was a time on this world you continued to spend. You were searching for happiness as if it is a worldly trend. Till you realized that it is all a game to pretend. Till you learned that we are all the same and on each other we can’t really depend. Till you felt the happiness from giving just for God’s sake and the times a helping hand you lend. Till you started having conversations with people you didn’t know as if for many years you have been friends…
The pain you feel in your heart from not getting what you wanted to happen someday it will outgrow. It will take a month or two or even years give it time it will be slow. There will be times where you will have no strength to face this world and you will feel low. There will be times you will be lost in your thoughts trying to figure out where you went wrong though. There will also be times you will be annoyed and you will ignore all the other blessings on you that has been bestowed. But it’s okay let it all out so you can let it go. Because to see the beauty of your current situations the past thoughts and plans you need to get rid of and throw. Eventually you will get used to it all and start liking your routine but sometimes you will think of everything that you wanted to happen though. Those thoughts come back to you not to annoy but to make you realize and show. That you can also be happy in a place that you never wanted to go. Always remember He knows what you do not know (Surah al-baqarah). And a day will come sooner or later when God will reveal it to you and show.
At night when I lay in bed, sleep took over me and I ignored all the blessings around me so I forgot Him. In the morning I was late and in rush forgetting who gave me another day to live so I forgot Him. At lunch I had so many plans ignoring that I have food in front of me that many don’t have so I forgot Him. I craved something and the next moment someone else brought it for me, I got over excited forgetting the One who knows my heart so I forgot Him. I was sick and spent those uncomfortable nights laying awake, then I got better and continued with my life forgetting who cured me so I forgot Him. I gave myself a cut by mistake and couldn’t use that hand for days, I took the bandage off and it was healed…I didn’t give a thought to who healed it so again I forgot Him. People treated me unfairly and I stayed quiet even when I was right… who gave me that patience I didn’t question so I forgot Him. I had so many things that needed to be done all in one day… at the end of the day I had it all done not giving a thought to how my day went so productive so I forgot Him. Others praised me for something, I smiled taking the credit and that moment I forgot Him. I achieved so much in my life I looked around me and still complained and I forgot Him. Some said I inspire them … I didn’t give a thought to who inspires me and that moment once again I forgot Him. I wanted something so badly but I didn’t ask for it, He still gave it to me and Yet I forgot Him. I had a roof over me. food to eat, bed to sleep and a family that loved me yet I still desired other things so I forgot Him. I am ashamed that I forgot Him. I question myself why I forgot Him? He knows that I forgot Him. And He still gave me so much more than I asked for and didn’t leave a thing. Oh how big is our sin that we forgot Him?
Don’t you just love productive days where you feel like you got so much done. The days where you feel you are so organized and are on a constant run. Recently I woke up one morning panicking at the fact how fast time is flying. Then I felt better by reflecting over how much I achieved in the past 6 months and that motivated me to keep trying. Life is a continuous struggle but what will matter in the end is how hard we strive. And we can’t try our best if we don’t care of our five before five (hadith).
We must take care of our youth before our old age. And we can truly take care of that when we understand that everyday in our lives is a new page. Your life is where you give your best performance and you must always think of it as your personal stage. Things that don’t benefit us is those many times in our lives we engage. But what matters is how fast we come back to realizing and freeing ourselves from that cage.
Next is taking care of our health before we fall sick. Take it as an example that you are walking without a burden and all of a sudden on your shoulders there is a heavy brick. With that brick now you can’t walk as fast and there are many things that go on a delay which before you could have done quick.
Your wealth before you go broke. It is better to be wise and not waste all that money as if life is a joke. Because once you are done with your wealth there is really nobody who will help you sincerely and that is usually when God many people invoke.
Your free time before your days get all booked up. And you can’t find the time to even sit with your family just for one tea cup. And then you remember those days you were all free and didn’t do much. And now you don’t have time for anything just your luck.
Lastly we must take care of our life before our death. Because it is all over and done when we take our last breath. Leaving behind our health, time, our age and our wealth. There is nothing much that can be done then there is no one then who we can ask for help.
We take pictures of the creation to show to the creation, to get credit from the creation for something we didn’t create.Forgetting the Creator who created that creation because for everything the credit we ourselves want to take.