words that haven't been spoken. actions that have and haven't been taken. thoughts that came to mind through inspiration. lessons that were learned after being mistaken. towards writing I hasten. peace be on you ツ
There comes a time in a life where you feel like you are facing a wall. You are stuck, you can’t get over it, you feel so small. Sometimes everything happens at once and sometimes nothing happens at all. You can’t make a decision so you sit there crying and your eyes you bawl. Forgetting that this is your life and you must stand tall.
All that only happens only when you look towards others to make your decisions for you. Instead of hearing your own heart and listening to what it wants you to do. Recently someone told me get rid of your emotions will you? And I sit there and question with a dead heart how are you supposed to survive this life through? How do you walk around pretending you are OK and inside you don’t feel gray and blue? It is very easy for some while it becomes an everyday battle for some in their own shoes. To get up and pretend as their lives pass through. Their hearts already dead just waiting for them to be dead too. And this is a life story of so many if only you knew.
Can I do this? Can I do that? Asking others for approvals for things you actually want to do. Goals you want to achieve, visions you want to make true. And then someone answers no and you sit there think ‘maybe they are right and I am not capable for this to do.’ You keep hearing disapprovals from others that you end up living the average life as others do. Forgetting that the One who created you never limited your goals and visions and that He is the One who inspires you to do. He controls your Hearts and is the One who puts those feelings in your hearts for you.
And here you are being silly asking for approval from His creation as if they control you. Not standing up for yourself and what you want to do. Living to please others, scared they might not like you. Giving others power over yourself when God is the One holding all power and He is the One who created you. Letting your heart die and then feeling sorry for yourself too. When will you stand up for yourself and you decisions. Please tell me that will you? Is it today? Is it tomorrow? Will it be too late? Or will you find the courage to do it soon?
What is this world but a beautiful distraction? Something towards which we feel attraction. To our eyes it brings satisfaction. Our words may say something else but we give a total different message through our actions.
In this world it is so easy to get lost. Even if we can see a clear view, it is a matter of seconds for our focus to get lost. Getting into accidents because our road something crossed. Getting distracted then wondering why in the race we came last. Trying to achieve the best of this world at any cost.
This world failing us over and over again. We turn wise for a while then run after it without any shame. We want to fall down and keep looking for someone to finally understand our pain. So we look for that in other people and sit there to complain and complain. It’s a constant cycle as if we have built a chain. We complain and they complain as if we are saving each other from going down the drain. But why are we so deaf dumb and blind that we don’t use our brain?
We ourselves are responsible for creating the biggest barrier between our happiness. How insane! We know we will all go in the grave one day but we fill it up with mud as if that’s not a real thing. That is when we lose our focus, what a shame! So that is when the race begins, our hearts full of stains. Trying to justify our actions by saying but please let me explain.
Our heads confused and our hearts full of pain. Not being thankful for each and every grain. Forgetting the blessing of seeing through our eyes and getting annoyed with when it rains. So busy capturing moments on a camera that we forget what was the real thing. Sitting together with real people yet busy on our phones playing games. Then when they die we remember them as our main.
So why do we complain for all that pain? When we caused it all by ourselves because we went off the lane. When we are the ones who couldn’t stop ourselves and restrain. When we are the ones who wanted the best of this world and keep running after this train. When we are clearly given the real focus of this life and what we are really here to attain. Why do we still complain? Losing our happiness and focus and causing ourselves to drain. Oh what a shame! What a shame!
I can’t find the words tonight, maybe you’ll hear my heart. I don’t know where to begin, I don’t know where to start. I stand back and look at my life and it looks like a work of art. Sometimes you have it all together, sometimes it falls apart. Some days you wish for it all to restart.
You know the saying where a blessing comes as a test. Nowadays there are some counting the materialistic things and hash tagging it as ‘blessed’. We all fall for that once in a while not realizing that we are the same as all the rest. So how do you acknowledge whether it is a blessing or a test? Do we really sit down and think that this question must be addressed?
We get what we want and we say “omg so blessed’. While He may have given that you with so many different tests. Patience, sincerity, justice and humbleness. Sometimes to see how you deal with all the stress. What may seem like a blessing is a test on its own. Just to see if you will find your way back home. Not everything that shines is gold. He shows you that in His own way and then you heart turns cold. Confused, lost and your emotions uncontrolled. What you thought was perfect, was not perfect at the end. You are burdened you are tired, so you look for a friend. And once again your broken heart, it is He that mends.
They say that He tests the One he loves. And that He sends His blessings down from above. So much has happened you don’t know where to begin. Secrets that nobody knows where you wanted to crawl out of your skin? Times where you felt you were falling deeper and deeper into sin? Times where you did not have the strength to keep up that chin. But you walked through it all, crawled on your knees, ran where you could… tell me did you not win?
So tonight you can’t find the words because it was a mixture of all. You ran, you struggled, you let go and sometimes you ran into walls. Sometimes it was easy to get out, sometimes it was a close call. Who then gave you strength to still stand tall? The Only One hearing your heart right now is the One who already knows it all. He makes a way out for you no matter what befalls. He shows you in His own way of what you thought was the best, how imperfect it is all. What you thought was so big, in real how it is so small.
It’s been a long time when out of nowhere with these words I stopped.In the race of this life there are so many holes and traps over which you always have to hop. Sometimes you can run past them as fast as you can while other times you end up falling in those holes deeper than it was actually planned. It all really depends on what is in your heart. What your intentions are, where do you want to go and where did you start? If your intentions are to run home then there will be no stop for you no matter how many roads you find blocked. But if your intentions are to look around and make some stops here and there then know that you are bound to drop.
By dropping in the hole I don’t mean that’s your end. Remember it is about the intentions and where we actually began. Just by falling does not mean you will now stay in that trap. If your heart remembers the real goal of running home you will eventually begin to suffocate in that plastic wrap. But if your heart has moved far away, it will sit there lost and confused not knowing where to look and what to grab. It is all really a self process of how fast you can bring yourself back. Truly it is the intentions of our hearts that we really need to track.
Sometimes we run as fast as we can. But other times we fall not remembering our life purpose and where we began. Sometimes all it takes is a prayer or a thought to bring ourselves back. And other times we sit there with our confused minds, the ability to get up again we lack. It is all a struggle and everyday we get attacked. To check how far you have come is the only time you should look back!
I think I find it funny that the last time I wrote was about giving them a piece of your mind. Letting it out and show that you were not blind.But then you never know in tomorrow what will you find. In a month you can turn blind. By that I don’t mean literally but by this world that you have been racing behind. This heart of yours constantly reminds. But from one thing to another through out the day… you don’t have time?
So you struggle day by day… just few minutes to yourself … just some thoughts… just to make sense of what is really on your mind. Running from one thing to another, keeping yourself together that nine to five grind. You complain to yourself, others around you and they try to be kind. But where is that peace of mind?!
You leave one thing for another, try to fit it all and a thought from the past runs through your mind. Where once you wanted to be busy, you wanted a routine, you got what you wanted? Oh wow? Your God is Most Kind (Surah Al-Hajj). You still have the nerves to sit here and complain that you don’t have time? When you once wanted it all, why are you so blind?
Being grateful for it all is where you will find that peace of mind. What you have been searching for, what your heart to you is trying to remind. Sometimes to get peace of mind you need to give yourself a piece of your own mind. Because truly your God is Most Kind. He is Most Kind.
Splash of colours for sunset today had me thinking.
It is that time where you must give them a piece of your mind. Just because you were quiet does not mean you were blind. They kept taking advantage because you have always been so kind. But you must sit with yourself and look at how Self Respect is defined. How you have always been thrown of by them, to yourself you must remind. It is finally time to respect your morals and values and let all those words out that you have combined. In yourself that inner strength, that lost soul you must find. And finally give them a piece of your mind.
Don’t remind an arrogant how to them you have always been so kind. All that you have done, to a selfish person don’t remind. Every time you were there for them, don’t look at the past that you have left behind. Just do this to get your self respect back and hit them with reality that all this time you were not blind. You deserve so much better than what has been left behind.
But in order to move on to the next chapter, you must close this one by giving them a piece of your mind.
There are some people in our lives that we refer to saying they know us inside out. We can go to them for anything, share with them any secret, and trust them without a doubt. And then a day comes we find out this one little thing that we could never imagine or think about. And we cry out loud calling ourselves stupid for trusting them and all of a sudden we have countless reasons of why we hate them and all those words we want to shout…
Silly us for first of all for even thinking that another creation can know us inside out. You are created and the other person is also created, that is a fact with no doubt. It is so easy to rely on other things and people in this world, something we actually look for in our lives through out. Truth be told this life will never be easy either with certain things or even without. And then there are people who we thought we knew inside out. We felt happy knowing them thinking we know what’s in their hearts and sometimes because of that we felt proud. And then they do something so we sit here and wonder out loud. That how could they do this to us we would have never thought or imagined we want to question and shout…
Take a minute to get to know yourself before getting so interested in knowing the other creation inside out. Take a minute to think before you give someone the title that they know you inside out. Because really if you think about it that is not something for which you should feel proud. Because that one secret you never shared with anyone there is still Someone who knows the whole story behind it without a doubt. And He is the Only One that knows your heart and truly knows you inside out. He is the Only One that knows your wants and needs and knows what you think about. He knows you inside out. I can say this without a doubt.
Countless lessons you keep learning as His blessings He sends. To be wise is one thing but there was a time on this world you continued to spend. You were searching for happiness as if it is a worldly trend. Till you realized that it is all a game to pretend. Till you learned that we are all the same and on each other we can’t really depend. Till you felt the happiness from giving just for God’s sake and the times a helping hand you lend. Till you started having conversations with people you didn’t know as if for many years you have been friends…
The pain you feel in your heart from not getting what you wanted to happen someday it will outgrow. It will take a month or two or even years give it time it will be slow. There will be times where you will have no strength to face this world and you will feel low. There will be times you will be lost in your thoughts trying to figure out where you went wrong though. There will also be times you will be annoyed and you will ignore all the other blessings on you that has been bestowed. But it’s okay let it all out so you can let it go. Because to see the beauty of your current situations the past thoughts and plans you need to get rid of and throw. Eventually you will get used to it all and start liking your routine but sometimes you will think of everything that you wanted to happen though. Those thoughts come back to you not to annoy but to make you realize and show. That you can also be happy in a place that you never wanted to go. Always remember He knows what you do not know (Surah al-baqarah). And a day will come sooner or later when God will reveal it to you and show.
Toronto | This beautiful view from a friend’s room.
Sometimes we take the right decisions but the past we never forget. Sometimes you move on with your life with the right things but your decisions at times you still regret. Sometimes we miss the past and sit quietly and one or two tears we shed. And sometimes all around us people go on with their lives ignoring how we feel and seeing our lives as all set.
But you didn’t forget, you didn’t forget. The times you were helpless and the times they all left. The times they made you feel so weak as if they have done so much and on your shoulders there is so much debt. The time they mocked you and threw you down as a burnt cigarette. And then they ignore what happened in the past as if it is easy to forget.
Only God was there to show you a way when you needed to be led. Only He was there who saw and you He didn’t forget. And now when your life is all set… they come back offering you the same that you once wanted ignoring that you were once upset. He sees what you want and makes you free of the want and now you don’t want to get (Surah ad-Duha). It’s all in your head what they once said. It’s all in your heart what you once felt. They remember it all but pretend to forget. But you need to let them know that you didn’t forget!
Because you didn’t forget, you didn’t forget. All those tears that you once shed. You didn’t forget how you once felt. When they all walked away and all by yourself you were left. You didn’t forget who then came as always to help. You didn’t forget and He didn’t forget.